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| About me
I'm a 5 month old bloodhound from Mississippi, with a discriminating palate, a taste for chicken kiev, the arts and high fashion. So I used my telekinetic powers to summon one fat hopeless human to pay my travel and expenses to come to New York. How many of you have been able to do that without saying a word?
Upon arriving at his humble, I mean humble abode... I decided to spruce up the place and really settle in. I'm more of a minimalist so I decided to render some furniture in the home useless. Now that there's some room for me to stretch my legs and have some friends over, I'm starting to like the place, I think the word is quaint.
I enjoy trips down the street and listening to my two-legged human lie about his service on the K-9 unit, and how he retired and took me in.... AS IF! Let's get this straight, I was not destined for a life of service, and sniffing out bombs...look I eat pig ears but that doesn't make me one. I have a very discriminating palate, I mean... you can't expect me to eat kibble if I smell porter house. That's just common sense... Can I get a howl if ya hear me... word to the most high Selasie! Anyways....I've met some real city slickers out here... like these two dogs across the hall: Calvin and Bailey. Calvin is cool, I mean I sense a pompist vibe around him, he thinks I'm too young to play with him...emm more than fine with me. His sister on the other hand has had a thing for me since day one.
Not that I'm one of these dogs that just goes to the gym and takes care of himself and is well traveled and thinks he's just above everyone else....certainly not... but com'on... I'm not one of these guys that's just looking for a physical relationship. You'd have to be a real dog to think like that. Engage my mind, then I can break you off...they don't call me mc'lovin for nothing.
So that's enough ranting for now...my human is preparing a flank steak which I have to inspect. - McLovin
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